William's father had died in this place Same day he buried his mother Will he gets rutted here on this special day But he can't this year No he can't this year Fecking Covid has closed all the pubs Brendan was rotting in Castlerea Prison When they let him out he left behind dreams and rats His missus had waited, and when they were sated He can't get a pint Not a whiskey or two Fecking Covid has closed all the pubs So hoist 'em lads And lasses too The virus might keep us alone But a whiskey and a pint Is your god given right It can't stop you from drinking at home Fergal went roving round Monaghan one night When he noticed he was outside the town He found a door in the Hill of the Stone Inside there was music And whiskey and stout Which was good, cause he'd closed all the pubs When out he came No one knew his name So they moved him into St Davnet's They let him out this year He's in need of good cheer But he can't get a pint And he can't get a dram Fecking Covid has closed all the pubs So hoist 'em lads And lasses too The virus might keep us alone But a whiskey and pint Is your god given right It can't stop you from drinking at home Tonight at the edge of the wood I saw The fetch of my own true self As I approached, he fled on legs the wrong way round Now my hair and beard has all gone white Fecking Covid has closed all the pubs The faerie ring It seems to sing The stones look like a mansion My gran she said No one can dance like the dead I might as well get dancing Fecking Covid has closed all the pubs So hoist 'em lads And lasses too The virus might keep us alone But a whiskey and a pint Is your god given right It can't stop us from drinking at home So hoist 'em lads And lasses too The virus might keep us alone But a whiskey and a pint Is your god given right It can't stop us from drinking at home

When I was a young Colonel I fought furry robots underground When I heard of a Police Box That could travel all around Time and space were playthings To the science on my side So whatever thing the Doctor says I take it all in stride Oh, I’ve got golden bullets and silver bullets And bullets to pierce a Dalek I’ve got Teflon-coated laser guided Uranium cored atomics Ye cannae blame my bonnie boys UNIT’s a one for tryin’ I hope the Doctor gets here soon ‘Cause all my boys are dyin’ Then for what seemed a decade In a time I can’t quite place He always seemed to be about And twice he changed his face And often I was tested In the face of woe and weal One thing I proved time and again Lethbridge-Stewarts are British steel ONE TWO THREE Oh, I’ve got golden bullets and silver bullets And bullets to pierce a Dalek I’ve got Teflon-coated laser guided Uranium cored atomics Ye cannae blame my bonnie boys UNIT’s a one for tryin’ I hope the Doctor gets here soon ‘Cause all my boys are dyin’ When the world’s gone topsy-turvey That’s when I fight the weird There’s never been an alien Who’s given me the fear When the wicket’s at its stickiest That’s when you’ll hear me say “Five rounds rapid” UNIT wins the day Now I’ve fought Cybermen and Yeti Autons and the Master Axons, Zygons, Ogrons, Daleks Omega and Borusa Though there be Azal or Silurians Extradimensional foes of Arthur I’ll go on fighting Even as I face the Great Destroyer Oh, I’ve got golden bullets and silver bullets And bullets to pierce a Dalek I’ve got Teflon-coated laser guided Uranium cored atomics Ye cannae blame my bonnie boys UNIT’s a one for tryin’ I hope the Doctor gets here soon ‘Cause all my boys are dyin’ When the world’s gone topsy-turvey That’s when I fight the weird There’s never been an alien Who’s given me the fear When the wicket’s at its stickiest That’s when you’ll hear me say “Five rounds rapid” UNIT wins the day Oh, I’ve got golden bullets and silver bullets And bullets to pierce a Dalek I’ve got Teflon-coated laser guided Uranium cored atomics Ye cannae blame my bonnie boys UNIT’s a one for tryin’ I hope the Doctor gets here soon ‘Cause all my boys are dyin’ When the world’s gone topsy-turvey That’s when I fight the weird There’s never been an alien Who’s given me the fear When the wicket’s at its stickiest That’s when you’ll hear me say “Five rounds rapid” UNIT wins the day Oh, I’ve got golden bullets and silver bullets And bullets to pierce a Dalek I’ve got Teflon-coated laser guided Uranium cored atomics Ye cannae blame my bonnie boys UNIT’s a one for tryin’ I hope the Doctor gets here soon ‘Cause all my boys are dyin’ When the world’s gone topsy-turvey That’s when I fight the weird There’s never been an alien Who’s given me the fear When the wicket’s at its stickiest That’s when you’ll hear me say “Five rounds rapid” UNIT wins the day When the wicket’s at its stickiest That’s when you’ll hear me say “Five rounds rapid” UNIT wins the day When the wicket’s at its stickiest That’s when you’ll hear me say “Five rounds rapid” UNIT wins the day When the wicket’s at its stickiest That’s when you’ll hear me say “Five rounds rapid” UNIT wins the day